I don't know if anyone else does this, but I often apologize to cashiers when I hand them a twenty-dollar bill.
"I'm sorry. This is all I have."
I should say, "I'm sorry that the ATM doesn't give out anything but twenties," but that would be sarcarsm. I am saddened to say that I once felt something close to elation when I discovered an ATM in the Williamsburg neighborhood of Brooklyn that gave out ten-dollar bills. I thought of all the cabbies I could pay and how easy it would be to make change for laundry. Not to mention that a ten is the bill that everyone longs to have when splitting the check with friends after dining out!
Oh no. I sound like an asshole. Lots of people would love to have the problem of paying people in twenties. This would be like some rich person apologizing for only having hundreds.
On that same note, I overheard a guy in the elevator this morning casually mention that he lives in a house that came with a tennis court in the backyard (soft court, if you are curious). He has problems, too, though. It seems that he decided to rip up the court to make way for grass, and the seeds just won't take. Oh, bother!
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